Please forgive my lack of studio polish. I am pretty much yelling into a tin can connected to my laptop with string. And now, without further ado, Rise of the ELDRZA AKA InkweLL Cool J presents ...
(Note for my age-deprived fans: this is a parody of LL Cool J's old school jam "Going Back to Cali." Look it up.)
Going back to Ravni, Ravni, Ravni I'm going back to Ravni ... ca, I don't think so. I'm going back to Ravni, Ravni, Ravni I'm going back to Ravni ... ca, I don't think so.
Going back to Ravni, the city, so gritty no itty-bitty shred of pity, on these mean streets Two-fers of mana, supposed to choose a guild But for now I’mma stay a free agent Cause there’s ladies in the Senate and the Barracks and the Sewers and I’m pleased to make their acquaintance KABOOM spells are flowin, keyrunes tappin Swervin to dodge that mana-screw Speech is slurred, summon a bird Drop a shock and take 2.
[chorus]
I’m going back to Ravni, samplin em, tramplin em Rampin em to drops they never before hit In the garden of the Conclave, tree roots squirm Where the dryads wink, then populate a wurm Like a prison term, Azorius, she’s drainin Motionin, fili-busterin, detainin I met her at the Swarm, to scavenge up some hugs I want her bod, Jarad, but I don’t want your bugs.
[chorus]
I’m going back to Ravni, blasting, surpassing casting all my charms, all three modes Her smile - leered; type - weird She said, she liked, steam. She showed me a chain, mocked my pain and unleashed a devilish scream. Now I thought I was sick, but this girl was sicker She’s lustin for arterial spray I said, “Let’s park,” ignited my spark and planeswalked the hell away.